Never Evers Page 13

  Rather than being insulted, Roland looked quite pleased.

  ‘Ah … So you are not super fans?’

  ‘We’re not even fans full stop,’ said Max.

  ‘Excellent,’ beamed Roland. He stuck his hand out and we all shook it and introduced ourselves.

  ‘So, what are you doing up here, anyway?’ asked Toddy. ‘Apart from smashing up weathervanes.’

  ‘My hotel is up there.’ Roland nodded further up the hill. ‘I just sneaked out to have some time to myself to think. Time to myself is quite a rare thing at the moment.’

  ‘Yeah,’ I said. ‘You’re everywhere. Well, your posters are anyway.’

  He nodded. ‘I am here to film my new video. But I can’t even walk the street in daylight without being surrounded.’ He pointed at his hood. ‘That’s why I have to do all this, even when I go for a walk at night, halfway up a mountain.’

  ‘Your English is pretty good, you know,’ said Max. ‘Better than our French, anyway. We only know “Ma perruche est dans la zone piétonne” and “Monsieur, votre grand-mère était un blaireau.”’

  Roland laughed. ‘Just the essential phrases, then.’

  ‘How old are you?’ Toddy asked him.

  ‘Fifteen.’

  ‘Woah, man,’ said Max, impressed. ‘You’re only a year older than us and you can speak a whole other language fluently.’

  ‘Max can barely speak one language fluently,’ noted Toddy, and Max slapped him round the head.

  Roland chuckled. ‘My managers made me learn English intensively last year, because they want me to “break England” and “break America”. They feel I have conquered France, now they want to take me worldwide.’

  ‘Sounds pretty terrifying,’ I said. Roland was conquering the world; I couldn’t even conquer Band Night in the dining hall.

  ‘What you on about?’ said Max. ‘Sounds brilliant.’

  Roland somehow managed to shrug with both his body and face. ‘Being famous … It’s not what you expect it will be. Sometimes … it’s not so easy.’

  ‘Oh yeah,’ said Max sarcastically. ‘I’m sure it must be awful to have millions of screaming girls chucking themselves at you every five seconds.’

  Roland smiled gloomily. ‘I guess it is difficult to explain. On the one hand, you have the fame, the money, the snowmobiles—’

  ‘You’ve got a snowmobile?!’ Max interrupted.

  Roland nodded impatiently. ‘Yes, yes, I have three. So, on the one hand you have these things, but on the other …’ He broke off and looked at us. ‘You no longer live life like a normal fifteen-year-old, you know? Going on dates, spending time with friends … You can’t do these things any more.’ He looked down at the little town below. ‘The only fun you have is throwing snowballs, alone, in the darkness.’

  Max wasn’t interested in this sort of deep, soul-searching stuff. ‘But you must have got off with tons of girls, yeah?’

  Roland laughed. ‘I do not kiss and tell, my friend.’

  ‘We don’t kiss or tell,’ sighed Toddy, and Roland laughed again.

  ‘So, like … have you got any tips?’ asked Max. ‘For getting girls to like you?’

  Roland ruffled his hair as he considered this. ‘Just be yourself, I guess.’

  Max grunted. ‘I’m sure “being yourself” works if you’re a billionaire pop star, but we’ve been “being ourselves” for fourteen years and it’s got us literally nowhere.’ He stroked his top lip. ‘What about moustaches? Do you reckon girls like moustaches?’

  Roland frowned. ‘Maybe. Why, are you thinking to grow one?’

  Me and Toddy cracked up, as Max jabbed a finger at his own mouth angrily. ‘I’ve already grown one, mate. What do you think this is?’

  Roland peered closely at Max’s bumfluff with a slightly disgusted look on his face. ‘Yes … I see. Very … sophisticated.’ He straightened up and patted Max on the shoulder. ‘I’m sure the women will love it.’ Max bristled, proudly.

  We all stood in silence for a bit, looking down at the little town below us. It felt weird how un-weird it was having Roland with us. He didn’t seem like the most famous bloke in France, or like the cheesy, strutting poser off those posters. He just seemed … all right.

  ‘You know,’ he said, ‘I met an English girl today, actually. At my video shoot.’

  My heart suddenly span in to double speed. Max jabbed me in the ribs. ‘We know her!’ he blurted. ‘That was Mouse!’

  Roland’s massive blue eyes got even wider. ‘Yes! Mouse. I was thinking of her a bit today. You know her, really? You are friends with her?’

  Max shook his head. ‘Nah. She hates us. No idea why. She’s mental. So are her mates. Fit but mental. They dress insanely, they keep rats and hamsters in their cupboards and they blank you for no reason. Steer well clear, if you want my advice. Eh, Jack?’

  I nodded. I really hoped Roland would steer well clear. If he fancied Mouse, I really wouldn’t have a chance in hell.

  ‘I mean, you can basically get any girl you want, can’t you?’ Max carried on. ‘So I don’t know why you’d settle for a crazy one.’

  Roland shrugged. ‘She seemed much less crazy than most of the girls I meet. Sometimes it is nice to find a girl who is not obsessed with you and constantly screaming at you and writing insane fan fiction about you. A girl who is just … normal.’

  ‘You’re mad,’ said Max. ‘Why would you pick a normal girl over one that totally and utterly worships you? You could’ve blatantly got off with any of those girls at your video shoot thing.’

  ‘You were there today, too?’ Roland asked.

  Max nodded. ‘We’re sort of in the music business as well, actually.’

  ‘Yes?’

  ‘Yeah. Well, we’re in a band.’

  ‘Ah, cool. Would I have heard your music?’

  ‘Unless you live next door to Max, probably not,’ said Toddy. ‘We’ve never actually played a gig.’

  ‘Yeah, but we’re gonna play one soon,’ Max snapped. ‘We’ll probably be touring France this time next year.’

  ‘Very nice,’ said Roland. ‘Do you all sing?’

  ‘No, just Jack,’ said Max, slapping me on the back, hard. ‘He’s our frontman. And not just because he looks like you.’

  Roland smiled and sized me up. ‘It is true, actually. Except for the eyes, I guess. And what is your band called?’

  ‘We’re sort of between names at the moment,’ Toddy said.

  Roland shook his head. ‘No good. You must have a name. You will never get anywhere without a name.’

  ‘Yeah, well, we’re working on it,’ muttered Max, and then his eyes lit up. ‘Maybe you could help us, actually! I mean, you could pull some strings, chat to some of your people, maybe get us a record deal or something?’

  Roland laughed, and bent down to scoop a handful of snow from the ground. ‘I’m not sure about the record deal, but I guess I could try to help you.’ He patted the snow in to a little round ball. ‘If I do that for you, though, maybe you can do something for me in return.’

  ‘Obviously,’ said Max. ‘Anything.’

  Roland aimed the snowball and hit the weathervane dead on, sending it tinkling round and round. Then he turned to us, his blue eyes half white in the moonlight. ‘Can you help me see Mouse again?’

  ‘Winter picnics are the best,’ Connie said, ripping her sandwich in half and handing it to me. That was the thing about Connie. The essence of her was good. She didn’t really know how to be anything other than nice. She had welcomed me back in to her life like I had never been away. We were beginning to feel like a group. Like we belonged. Whatever the gene is that most people are born with that gives you the ability to be mean, Connie just didn’t have it.

  I have it, though. Before the trip, I had worried people would judge me for hanging around with Connie, and last night, alone in the room, every single part of me had hated Lauren.

  Keira sprawled on the snow. ‘I’m in so much pain. Skiing this morn
ing was hard core. I wonder if we’ll ever get the hang of it.’ She looked over at Lauren, Scarlett and Melody eating their lunch at another picnic table.

  ‘Have any of them spoken to you?’ she asked, staring down at her marshmallow-loaded hot chocolate and back at them. I wanted to tell Keira not to look over. I didn’t want Lauren to think we were talking about them.

  I shook my head. ‘They’re just acting like I don’t exist.’

  ‘Good. We should actually forget they exist,’ Keira said. ‘Do I have a cream moustache?’

  Connie nodded. ‘Mouse, I wish we had gone with you. The things they said to you were really awful.’

  Keira sighed. ‘She wouldn’t have said it if we had been there. I keep telling you both. It’s not complicated. She’s just nasty. She’s jealous of Mouse because she’s going to school in Paris and is prettier than her and cooler or whatever. Who knows, whatever, she’s just one of those girls.’ In her boyish, offhand way, Keira made it sound like this simple, explainable, tiny thing.

  Going to school in Paris. I pushed the lie away again. I just wasn’t allowing myself to even think about how big it was getting. Lying to Keira and Connie on the first day had made me shiver, but not feel guilty the way I did now.

  ‘We should hex her,’ Keira said. ‘I know we’re white witches, but I’m pretty sure in this kind of situation they must make exceptions.’

  ‘Who’s “they”?’ Connie asked.

  Keira shrugged. ‘I don’t know. The parliament of … I haven’t read the whole book yet.’

  ‘No way,’ Connie said. ‘We’re not in to the dark arts. We’re white witches. We’re into the light arts.’

  ‘That makes us sound like we make lamps,’ Keira said, and handed Connie and me a Rolo.

  ‘No, I would feel bad,’ I said, ‘and anyway …’ I lowered my voice a bit even though there was no way they could hear. ‘I sort of did hex her already.’

  ‘What do you mean?’ Keira sounded impressed and surprised at the same time.

  ‘Well, I didn’t really. Just … last night before you guys got back. When I was upset … I was staring at your book on the bed … and I just thought about how much Lauren had upset me and … I wished something bad would happen to her. Which obviously I don’t actually wa—’

  ‘That’s totally a hex!’ Keira said. ‘You’ve hexed her. We formed a coven and became witches. Obviously now you have to be careful.’

  ‘Don’t be ridiculous. So, what, if I think I want an avalanche to happen it might—’

  ‘Nooooooooo!’ Connie yelled, and launched herself at me, covering my mouth with her hands.

  ‘OK,’ Keira said. ‘Maybe not thinking it, but saying it out loud would definitely count.’

  I kept quiet.

  And then Tania saved me. ‘Come on, guys, gather round.’

  Keira lay back in the snow and groaned loudly. ‘Every part of my body hurts.’

  Everyone was complaining constantly about the way skiing was affecting their muscles but it made me feel good, like my body was being used again. I liked going to sleep feeling like I had made it work, like I was training and getting better.

  ‘OK,’ Tania said, taking off her hat to reveal gold glitter in her pixie crop. ‘I get it, guys, you are all tired. So, this afternoon, we are going to go on a little adventure up the mountain.’

  ‘Can we build an igloo?’ Connie put her hand up as she said it, like she had meant to wait to be called on but couldn’t quite contain herself.

  Some girls rolled their eyes or made she’s-so-weird faces and laughed, but Tania’s eyes lit up.

  ‘Hell, yeah, I know the perfect, secret place, at the top behind the snowboarding park where no one goes. We can watch some hot guys do tricks at the same time.’

  Building the igloo took all afternoon. Most people drifted off to watch the fit boys doing tricks or practise their skiing. We collected snow and made it in to bricks with a bucket and then Connie and Tania laid them in a circle. We did it again and again until the sun started to turn pink in the sky. We laid the last brick in the top and stood around and admired it.

  Keira, Connie and me crawled in and Tania followed us.

  ‘It feels really magical,’ I said. ‘And warm. Like we really could sleep here.’

  ‘A good place for a lamp-making workshop,’ Keira said meaningfully, looking at us.

  ‘Headquarters for our coven,’ I whispered to Connie when she looked confused.

  ‘So,’ Tania said, pointing at my hat. ‘Is that the famous Roland hat?’

  I shook my head and reached into my pocket and handed her the real one.

  ‘I’m not in to Roland, but this is pretty cool,’ she said. ‘And he is a cute guy.’

  Keira did a double take. ‘Er … when you say “cute”, do you mean cute like a little kid, or cute like hot?’

  ‘Hot,’ said Tania, and Keira shot me a triumphant smile. I couldn’t help smiling back.

  ‘He said Mouse was cute,’ Connie said proudly. ‘So, do you have a boyfriend, Tania?’

  Keira tutted at Connie. ‘You are so inappropriate.’ Then she looked at Tania. ‘But do you?’

  Tania shook her head. ‘No. I am over guys. Completely. I hate them.’

  None of us knew what to say. It was a bit early for any of us to think about being done with boys; we needed to get started first.

  ‘This place does feel a bit magic,’ Tania said, changing the subject. ‘Do you wanna write something on the wall before we go?’

  ‘Our names, maybe?’ suggested Connie.

  ‘I was thinking more like the names of your crushes.’ Tania said, smiling.

  ‘I thought you hated men?’ I said.

  ‘Yeah, I hate them. That doesn’t mean I can’t like some of them as well.’

  ‘Complicated,’ Connie sighed.

  Keira started battering Alfie’s name in to the wall with the side of her phone, while Tania began scribbling a long list of weird-looking German names. Connie was scratching ‘RON WEASLEY’ with the key to our room.

  I wanted to write ‘Jack’ but I knew I couldn’t. Because he was going out with someone who hated me, who had told me he thought I was a weird stalker.

  ‘I know who you’re going to write,’ Tania said, patting the Roland hat.

  ‘Mouse, you’re so cute,’ Connie said in her Poirot voice. I took a pen out of my rucksack and slowly and painstakingly wrote ‘ROLAND’ across five bricks. He was good-looking, so I suppose objectively speaking I did fancy him.

  ‘Let’s go, guys,’ Tania said, admiring our workmanship.

  We started to walk slowly back to the snowboarding park. The sky was getting darker and it felt colder than it had since we arrived. Suddenly I didn’t want to leave the igloo like that. It felt unlucky, like I was tempting fate.

  ‘I left my scarf. I’ll catch you up,’ I shouted and turned back. I crawled into the igloo, carved ‘JACK’ as quickly as I could and crawled out again.

  I knew straight away something had happened, even from a distance. Everyone looked serious. People were very still and not talking to each other. And then I heard the screams. Tears and pain and fear all rolled in to one. I pushed myself along with my poles to go quicker.

  Everyone was staring at something on the ground a few metres away. Staring at the screaming. Something about the sound was familiar. I realized who it was the second before I saw her. She was lying on the ground with Tania next to her. Our eyes met, tears rolling down her face, contorted with pain. Lauren.

  Jack

  ‘Right, so, seriously … We need a plan. How are we going to do this?’ Max asked.

  The three of us were sat on the edge of the beginners’ slope, watching the rest of our class wobble and slam and smash in to each other. The second day of snowboarding was turning out even worse than the first. More pain, more frustration, more constant falling over. And absolutely zero progress. We were nearing the end of the afternoon session, and it was still only Jamie Smith that
could stand up on his board for more than thirty seconds at a time.

  Not that we cared, particularly. All we were thinking about was Roland.

  Ever since we crept back to the hotel last night, he was basically all we’d talked about. Max kept banging on about the crazy randomness of how we’d met him, and how he would definitely get us a record deal and make us famous. But I wasn’t bothered about all that stuff. I was only bothered about the fact that he liked Mouse. Because him liking her meant that I didn’t stand a chance. And now I’d agreed to help get them together. Honestly, what the hell was wrong with me?

  Max repeated his question. ‘Seriously, come on … What’s the plan? How can we help Roland see Mouse again? How exactly are we supposed to ask out a girl who hates our guts, on behalf of France’s number one mega pop star? I mean, any ideas are welcome.’

  ‘Mouse doesn’t hate our guts,’ I muttered. ‘Keira hates your guts. I don’t think Mouse has any strong feelings either way about our guts. Anyway, we could just not do it.’

  Max gawped at me. ‘Not do it?! Are you mental? Didn’t you hear what Roland said? If we can help him out with Mouse, then he can help us out with the band!’

  ‘How is he gonna help us out, though? I mean, seriously. You really think he’s gonna bag us a record deal? We’ve never played a gig!’

  Max wafted my words away like they were a bad coach-fart. ‘Jack, all I’m saying is: it’s not gonna harm us, is it, having a massive star dropping our band’s name in some influential circles?’

  ‘We haven’t even got a name!’ I yelled.

  ‘Yeah, well, we will do once I get off with Scarlett.’ Max winked. ‘Psycho Sex Death Squad.’ He held his arms out in front of him, as if imagining those ridiculous words on a massive Hollywood billboard. ‘All we’ve gotta do is figure out how to ask Mouse out for him.’

  ‘We don’t even really have to ask her out,’ Toddy noted. ‘He just wants us to tell her that he likes her, and see what she says. Then maybe try and get her to that press conference thing he’s doing tomorrow.’

  Roland was coming back to the ski slope tomorrow lunchtime to speak to a load of journalists. He’d asked us to try and get Mouse there so he could talk to her afterwards.